


Tea Time

by Ghostwriter (Zoya_Zalan)



Series: Flight of Illusion [1]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Drama, F/M, Mystery, Romance, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-20
Updated: 2015-04-20
Packaged: 2018-03-24 21:29:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3784897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zoya_Zalan/pseuds/Ghostwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The starship <i>Voyager</i> warps its way into a mysterious region of the Delta Quadrant as its commanding officers grow closer. Part One of the Flight of Illusion Series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tea Time

**Author's Note:**

> **Acknowledgements:** Many thanks to Carol for riding shotgun with me on this series so long ago. You are worth your weight in gold!
> 
> **Disclaimer:** Paramount owns all things Voyager; I'm just borrowing. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> **Notes:** _Voyager_ was my very first fandom way back in the early days. This series was a huge learning experience for me. It was an arduous journey, since I wound up completely revising all four installments over a two-year period. But the frustration was worth it — the sense of accomplishment I got from finishing this project fed my Muse for many years to come. I hope any readers enjoy this as much as enjoyed writing it!
> 
> Written in January 1998.

~ * ~ * ~

There was no denying it. She was in love with him... deeply. No one would have noticed any outward sign of torment, but on the inside, that knowledge was slowly tearing Captain Kathryn Janeway apart.

 _Voyager_ had been stranded in the Delta Quadrant for five years now, and despite her stubborn optimism, the reality of their situation was finally starting to sink in. They were sixty thousand light years from home, and unless they were lucky enough to find a stray wormhole that led back to the Alpha Quadrant, their journey could very well span an entire generation or more. Starfleet regulations were explicitly clear in matters concerning starship captains and fraternization. It was a necessary sacrifice, one most commanding officers accepted without question. But faced with their current predicament, Janeway could only stare helplessly at those words of wisdom, silently cursing the officials who had quite possibly condemned her to spend the rest of her life alone.

"Captain?" A distant voice brought her back to reality. As her eyes regained their focus, she found Commander Chakotay staring at her with some concern. "Are you all right?"

Janeway smiled as she looked into her first officer's dark eyes. "I'm fine, Chakotay." Her mind raced as she felt herself being lost inside those obsidian orbs. With his sensual, dark features, he was one of the most handsome men she'd ever seen. He was also one of the kindest, most compassionate people she'd ever met. It was definitely an intoxicating combination. _Down, Kathryn_ , she chided silently.

He smiled slowly, almost as if reading her thoughts. They had been flirting mercilessly for quite some time now. How it all started she didn't remember. All she knew was that she was enjoying herself immensely, even though their activity was strictly against protocol. It was all very innocent. Chakotay, being the gentleman that he was, respected her position and had never pushed for the relationship to go further.

He continued to stare at her relentlessly, daring her with unspoken words. Thankfully, they were in her Ready Room, away from the scrutiny of gossip mongers like Tom Paris. Otherwise, the fierce blush that spread across her face would have been her undoing. Gathering every last reserve, she tore her gaze from his and stood up, walking toward the replicator. "Can I get you something, Chakotay?" she asked evenly, trying to cut through the playful tension.

"That depends," he teased. "How long do you plan on keeping me hostage?"

Janeway responded without missing a beat. "Computer, two herbal teas, hot. Add extract of leola root to one, and designate it in a non-standard cup." Chakotay cringed at her words, knowing full well that she'd make him drink every drop. She waited patiently as the cups materialized, never once looking in his direction. After picking them up, she walked back and handed him the cup which clearly contained the undesirable substance.

He took it and stared into the menacing liquid, taking an experimental sniff while she resituated herself at her desk. _Very smooth, Kathryn_ , he thought as he took a sip. The bitter flavor sent his taste buds into shock, but he kept his outward appearance neutral, determined to outwit her. "Very good," he lied. "You should try this."

Janeway looked rather proud of herself as she spoke. "Not likely. What do you make of these reports on the Vardan sector?" Her transition was flawless, and he had to admit that she was doing a good job of keeping herself in check. Her eyes still sparkled, but her face was all business, another sign that he'd better finish all the tea and not try making excuses.

"I'm not sure what to make of it," Chakotay responded, turning his attention to the PADD in his hand. "The species that inhabit this sector seem to be a superstitious lot, despite their differing cultures."

Janeway nodded, gaze focused intently on some obscure point on her desk. "Two of those cultures opted to revert back to a level of pre-spaceflight technology... voluntarily, no less. That's something the Federation has never seen before. We've seen cultures forced to regress due to war or disease, but never of their own volition. It's as if something has frightened these people back into being surface dwellers."

"Does Neelix know anything about this area?" Chakotay asked, bracing himself for another mouthful of the tea.

"I've asked him to join us, though I haven't had the chance to brief him. I believe we're well past the territory of space that he's traveled through, but perhaps he's heard something along the way." As if on cue, the door chime sounded. "Come in," Janeway called, watching Chakotay as he took another sip from his cup, his nose wrinkling ever so slightly. 

Neelix entered with his customary smile and bouncy stride. The garishly dressed Talaxian was carrying a small tray filled with what looked like lavender-colored cookies. "Good morning Captain, Commander," he said cheerfully, setting the plate of cookies on her desk. "I thought you might enjoy a little snack while you work." The captain smiled. "Thank you, Neelix; that was very thoughtful. Please sit down." She picked up a PADD and studied it as she spoke, wasting no time in getting down to business. "We're about to enter an area of space known as the Vardan sector. I was wondering if you had any information you could add about this region; the reports we have are sketchy at best." Janeway was startled by what she saw when she looked back up at Neelix. The Talaxian had paled noticeably, and it looked like he was trying to shrink in his seat.

"Neelix, are you all right?" Chakotay asked quietly. Neelix's mouth was opening and closing slightly, like he couldn't find his voice.

"Neelix?" Janeway set her PADD down and started to stand up, but the sound of the Talaxian's whisper stopped her.

"How far away from Vardan space are we?"

"Approximately six hours. Neelix, what's wrong?" Janeway kept her voice soft, very aware of how unsettled her morale officer was.

Neelix swallowed audibly, then slowly turned his head to look out the observation window. His eyes were glazed with a touch of fear. When he spoke again, his voice was still a hushed whisper. "I would advise plotting a course around that region of space, Captain."

_Voyager's_ command team exchanged concerned glances. "According to these readings, it's a very large sector. Avoiding it would take us weeks out of our way," Janeway stressed. "Why, exactly, should we consider an alternate course?"

Neelix was still staring out the observation window, wringing his hands together nervously. "Pganga," he simply whispered, offering no further explanation for a few long moments. Janeway was about to say something when he finally continued, his voice gaining strength. "Pganga... the Lifeless Ones." Neelix turned to face the captain once again. "I've known people who ventured into this area, Captain, and the stories they told were enough to make my hair stand on end."

_Is that what happened_? Chakotay thought wryly, glancing at his commanding officer. The corner of Janeway's mouth twitched slightly as she fought back a smile.

Neelix continued, completely oblivious to the silent exchange. "Derelict ships, space phantoms, nightmares... monsters that haunt your dreams as well as your waking hours. No one is safe, Captain. No one comes out of Vardan space unaffected, if they come out at all." The Talaxian had leaned closer to her desk as he spoke until his face was mere inches from hers. His eyes were wild.

"Lifeless Ones?" the captain asked.

"A terrifying race of beings. Their presence is felt throughout the entire sector. They stalk passing ships, causing false readings and hallucinations until paranoia sets in. Then they move in for the final strike." His voice lowered back down to a whisper. "And the worst part is... they're invisible!"

Janeway was unconvinced. "How much of this information do you think is accurate, Neelix? Rumors could have been spread simply to deter travel through this particular region. Perhaps the natives..."

"I suggest you consider my advice, Captain," Neelix interrupted, his voice cracking. "If what I've heard are only rumors, then someone out there has an incredibly vivid imagination. I wouldn't want to see anything happen to _Voyager_."

Janeway hesitated, taken aback by the urgency in his voice. "Thank you for the warning, Mister Neelix; I'll consider it carefully. In the meantime, it might be best if you kept this information to yourself." She smiled, trying to ease his tension.

"Yes, Captain," the Talaxian answered softly, nodding his head. He got up from his chair and headed for the door, looking warily around the room as he walked.

When the doors finally slid shut after his departure, Janeway was still staring at the chair he had vacated. "I have no idea what to make of that."

Chakotay chuckled. "When in doubt, have a cookie." He reached out and took one of the lavender-colored circles, hoping he could deaden the taste of his tea with it.

"And yet, some of what he said seems to coincide with things mentioned in the reports we received at our last stop," she continued, finally looking at her first officer. "What do you think?"

"I think these cookies are pretty good," he answered, taking another bite and following it with a large gulp of the tea.

"Commander." Her voice was soft, but he recognized a warning behind the amused tone.

Looking up, he found himself swimming inside her beautiful blue eyes, stunned once again by the strength and determination he saw there. He'd never met a woman as strong as Kathryn Janeway. For the millionth time, he couldn't help but wonder when that strength was going to wear down, if ever. He smiled softly, accepting the reprimand.

"I think we should slow down... consider our options carefully," he replied, deliberately keeping his own voice quiet and even. Both her eyebrows arched at his choice of words, a small smile forming on her lips. She hadn't missed the innuendo.

"Agreed," she nodded, reaching up to tap her combadge. "Janeway to Conn."

"Paris here, Captain."

"Take us out of warp, Lieutenant. Continue on course at full impulse."

"Full impulse, aye," _Voyager's_ pilot responded just before the comm link closed.

Janeway reached for a cookie, still looking at Chakotay. "I can't believe you drank the tea," she smiled wickedly.

"Neither can I," he replied, setting the empty cup down. "Just don't tell Neelix; he's got enough interesting ideas without adding that to the breakfast menu."

Janeway choked on her cookie, imagining the looks on people's faces. When she could finally speak again, she shook her head, still chuckling. "No need to worry about that; my lips are sealed," she grinned, starting to get up from her seat. "Now, we've got some decisions to make. Let's get the senior staff assembled and try working our way through this."

"Aye, Captain," Chakotay said, getting up. He picked up the empty cups and placed them in the recycler, then walked back to her desk and snatched up the plate of cookies before following her out the door.

~ * ~ * ~

Despite Neelix's ominous warning, the decision was made to proceed through Vardan space. The reports they had gathered from neighboring civilizations offered no concrete proof that there was a tangible threat from these so called Lifeless Ones. Rumors and speculation seemed to be all that was available, and that wasn't enough for Janeway to back down.

"We are now entering Vardan space, Captain," Tuvok's voice cut through the quiet on the Bridge.

"Acknowledged. Go to yellow alert and maintain until further notice," Janeway ordered. She turned from where she stood in front of the viewscreen and headed back to her command chair. Chakotay looked at her inquiringly. When she was seated, she leaned toward him and spoke softly. "I'd like to be ready just in case Neelix's warning rings true." He nodded slightly, then returned his gaze to the visual displayed on-screen.

Janeway heard the Bridge doors open behind her, followed by footsteps entering. She sensed Seven of Nine's presence even before looking up to acknowledge her. The young woman marched purposefully down to where the captain was sitting and handed her a PADD.

"The Astrometric charts you requested, Captain," Seven stated matter-of-factly.

"Thank you, Ensign," the captain smiled, taking a good look at her newest Starfleet officer. The former Borg had come a long way since becoming a part of _Voyager's_ crew, and her desire to undergo the rigorous training required for Starfleet certification had greatly pleased her commanding officers. Her presence was an asset to the crew, as was her newfound dedication to the principles that governed those around her. "How does the uniform fit?"

"This uniform was replicated to my specifications, Captain. It fits me precisely," Seven responded with her usual indifference.

"That's good to hear. I wouldn't want you to be uncomfortable," Janeway acknowledged, trying hard to look serious.

"I assure you I am not. Am I dismissed?"

"Dismissed," the captain nodded. Once Seven was out of visual range, Janeway closed her eyes and fought back the urge to laugh. A low chuckle was all that escaped. She seriously wondered whether Tuvok had been the right person to oversee the young woman's Starfleet training. Seven was having a hard enough time understanding the nuances of human behavior; working with a Vulcan only confused the issue further. When she opened her eyes, she found Chakotay staring at her, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

"I don't know about that one, Captain," he said quietly. "We may have a problem keeping her under control... no concept of discipline."

Janeway chuckled softly, shaking her head. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught sight of Ensign Harry Kim staring longingly at the closed turbolift doors. Her heart went out to the young officer. He was obviously in love with Seven, and doing his best to help her understand what it meant to be human. That was no easy task, especially since the former Borg's humanity had been stolen from her at such a young age. But, if anyone could help Seven through this uncertain transitional phase, it was Kim.

Kim chose that moment to turn his head, catching the captain's eye in the process. The young ensign blushed furiously as he realized the captain knew exactly what he'd been thinking about. Janeway smiled warmly at him, allowing her eyes to express that she wasn't at all upset by his momentary lapse. He looked visibly relieved as he turned his attention back to his console.

With a soft sigh, Janeway stood up and handed Seven's report to Chakotay. "I trust I can leave these charts in your capable hands?" she asked. "If I don't get down there, he'll send a security detail to fetch me."

"Have fun in Sickbay, Captain," the first officer teased.

She scowled at him. "I'm sure I could arrange for your annual physical to be moved up a few months, Commander." She caught her breath as she realized the subtle innuendo of her words. Chakotay just grinned back, wiggling his eyebrows ever so slightly. Janeway's eyes widened and she glanced around quickly, hoping no one had noticed their exchange. She felt her cheeks start to flush as she realized Tuvok was observing them curiously from the Tactical station. Thankfully, everyone else was otherwise engaged. Forcing herself to remain calm, she gave Chakotay a very obvious ' _you'll pay for that one_ ' look and made a somewhat hasty retreat toward the turbolift.

Just as the doors opened, a bright pulse of light flashed from somewhere behind her. Startled, Janeway stopped and turned around. Nothing was out of place on the Bridge and the viewscreen continued to display a serene picture of the space they were traveling through. _Did I imagine that_? she wondered.

"Captain?" The voice was Tuvok's. He watched her carefully as she studied the room.

"Did you...?" she began, all embarrassment forgotten.

Both of the Vulcan's eyebrows rose. "Is anything wrong, Captain?" he asked quietly after a moment's pause.

"Never mind," Janeway responded, absently shaking her head. _Make sure the Doctor checks your eyes, Kathryn_ , she told herself as she turned and headed into the turbolift, giving Tuvok one last reassuring nod. At her departure, the Vulcan took a moment to scan the Bridge himself. Satisfied that everything was in order, he turned his attention back to his work.

~ * ~ * ~

Tom Paris strolled into Sickbay, his trademark grin firmly in place. Looking around, the pilot and part-time medical officer finally spotted _Voyager's_ holographic doctor taking inventory of the supplies in the bio-lab. "Hey, Doc," he called as he crossed the main examination area. "What's on the agenda for today? Do I get to practice open-heart surgery?"

"You're awfully enthusiastic, Mister Paris," the Doctor noted distastefully.

"What can I say, Doc. I love my job."

The EMH hurumphed loudly. "In that case, all the bio-beds need recalibration, all the medical instruments need to be checked and inventoried, and all the laboratory data needs to be downloaded into the proper categories and cross-checked."

Paris's smile disappeared as he listened. "Someone got activated on the wrong side of the holo-emitters today."

"In a manner of speaking," the EMH growled. "My life would be considerably easier if I didn't have to deal with starship captains."

The pilot grinned once more, a twinkle of mischief forming in his eyes.

"There is no one more difficult than Captain Janeway when it comes to her own health," the Doctor continued. "I should be grateful she reported for her physical of her own volition; last year I had to threaten to call security."

"She's a tough lady," Paris agreed, taking the special diagnostic scanner the Doctor handed him.

"I don't know who detests the experience more, her or me. Maybe next year I'll let you do the honors."

"Oh no..." the pilot shook his head emphatically as he turned and headed back into the main room. "I'll stick to equipment maintenance, thank you."

The sound of the EMH's grumbled reply was lost as the door to Sickbay opened, admitting Harry Kim. The young ensign was grimacing as he walked toward his friend. Paris's demeanor changed instantly from amusement to concern.

"Harry?"

Kim slid up on one of the diagnostic beds as the pilot grabbed a medical tricorder. "Very bad headache," he explained softly. "It hit me like a photon torpedo a little while ago. I don't know what brought it on."

Paris scanned the younger man thoroughly. "Your blood pressure is slightly elevated; epinephrine level is a bit high, too."

"Will I live?" Kim joked, grinning despite the pain.

"Long enough to enjoy the time off you have coming up in a few days," Paris smiled, reaching for a hypospray. "In fact, a day off is exactly what you need. Your headache is most likely stress-induced; there doesn't appear to be any viral or bacterial source for it, and you're in perfect health otherwise."

"But I'm not really under any stress."

"Oh, of course not, Harry," the pilot offered wryly. "All those extra Engineering and Astrometrics projects you volunteered for are just for fun, right?"

Kim closed his eyes in embarrassment as the hypospray hissed against his neck. The pain lessened immediately, causing him to breathe deeply in relief.

"Let's see, bucking for a promotion, or a good excuse to spend more time with Seven," Paris continued playfully. "Hmmm, which could it be?"

"I'm not bucking for a promotion," Kim explained, "and I enjoy helping out in other departments."

"Well, your body obviously has a problem with the extra work load, Har. Maybe you should listen to what it's telling you." The pilot smiled sympathetically. "There must be other ways to impress Seven without striving for Borg-like efficiency."

"Not likely," Kim murmured dejectedly.

"Why don't you invite her to do something fun?"

"' _Fun is inefficient_ '," Harry quoted.

"Then it's up to you to convince her that it isn't."

"Oh, no stress there," the young ensign emphasized, his eyes filled with humor. "The logic required to prove that theory would challenge even Tuvok."

"I have complete faith in your abilities, Harry," Paris laughed, clapping his friend's shoulder. "You'll do fine."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence... I think. So, what are you up to tonight?"

"I have a date with Chakotay."

Kim suddenly looked very intrigued. "Really? Does B'Elanna know or are you trying to hide this relationship?"

"Very funny," Paris grinned. "It's a pool date."

"You two are going to go insane trying to out-do each other, you know."

"Chakotay is convinced that I'm cheating somehow. He just can't admit I'm a better pool player than he is. But, you won't hear me complaining; I'm winning some decent replicator rations from—"

Paris stopped mid-sentence as Kim suddenly jumped off the bio-bed, a look of stunned confusion on his face.

"What's wrong?" Paris asked.

Kim was staring at some point behind the pilot. "The bulkhead... for a split second, there were holes all over the bulkhead, and I could see into space."

Paris turned to follow Kim's gaze. "It looks okay to me, Harry." Warily, he pulled the medical tricorder out and began scanning his friend once more.

"I saw them clear as day," Kim insisted.

"I believe you," Paris said calmly. "Severe headaches can sometimes cause visual disturbances — holes in your line of vision."

"This didn't look like a visual disturbance; it looked real. I saw stars and everything."

Paris clasped the younger man's arm reassuringly. "Why don't you lie down and close your eyes for a few minutes, give the medication a chance to do its job. I'll let the captain know you'll be here for a bit."

Reluctantly, Kim nodded and slid himself back onto the bio-bed. Paris waited until his friend had lain down all the way and closed his eyes before making his way toward the Doctor's office. Once he was gone, Kim shifted his head slightly and opened his right eye half-way, staring suspiciously at the bulkhead again. 

_Too real_...

~ * ~ * ~

After a long afternoon spent overseeing several tricky engineering projects, not to mention the dreaded visit to the Doctor, the doors to Janeway's quarters opened at 1930 hours to admit a very tired captain. She walked directly to her dressing area, peeling layers of her uniform off as she went. They fell to the floor in an untidy heap. She drew herself a hot bath and scented the water with lilac before climbing in and submerging with a sigh.

"I have got to get some sleep tonight," Janeway mumbled. She rubbed her temples lazily, trying to relax her command nerves into a more subdued state. Sleep had become something very precious, something she couldn't seem to indulge in for very long each night. Insomnia was nothing new to her, but as of late, it was becoming a nuisance. After the lecture she'd received from _Voyager's_ holographic gift to medicine, she'd wisely decided against mentioning it to him.

As she sat in the tub, deeply breathing in the relaxing aroma that enveloped her, the image of Chakotay wiggling his eyebrows suddenly flashed into her head. She burst out laughing, unable to control her reaction. Had anyone but Tuvok spotted the command team's interaction, she would have been far less amused. Grateful for the release, Janeway allowed herself to laugh at her first officer's boldness. "What a wiseguy," she breathed softly as she regained her composure. His face lingered in her mind longer than she expected. She found her thoughts wandering into uncharted territory... how his hands might feel, his lips...

"Okay, Kathryn, now I know you're over-tired," she declared, catching herself quickly before her imagination went into high gear. Leaning back farther into the water, she sighed loudly and let the warmth begin to ease the tension in her body.

It was Janeway's stomach that finally signaled the end of bath time. It gurgled loudly, reminding her that it had been more than a few hours since she'd eaten anything. Reaching down, she patted her abdomen lightly. "Yes, ma'am." Getting out, she dried herself off and slipped on a nightgown.

Standing in front of the mirror, the captain combed through her long hair. Something about her reflection caught her eye, making her lean closer. She stared at her face in disbelief, seeing tiny wrinkles around her eyes and on her forehead for the first time. As she traced the outline of one of them, she could feel some of the tension returning to her body. Her eyes wandered further up to her hair where she caught sight of two seemingly innocent strands of gray hiding among the golden brown.

"Hello," she whispered, feeling a sudden rush of sadness come over her. "Why haven't I noticed you before?"

She set the brush down, not wanting to find any more reminders of just how old she was becoming. Turning from the mirror, she slipped on a robe and slowly walked into the main room where she ordered her favorite pasta dish from the replicator. She wasn't really hungry anymore, but she knew she had to eat something. Her relaxed mood had turned into something a bit darker, with thoughts she'd held at bay suddenly rushing forth. She sat down heavily and poked at her food.

Mark... His name, once a source of strong affection and longing, was now just another word. A letter from him, received more than a year ago, had confirmed what she'd known would happen all along: he'd moved on with his life. In all, she was very happy for him. What they'd shared together was very special to her, and always would be, but she was grateful that he'd found happiness. She only wished she could have that same luxury.

Just as she was about to give up trying to eat, her door chime sounded. "Come in," she called. Chakotay entered wearing one of those devastating smiles that sent shivers up her spine. She held off smiling back, which was not that much of an effort given the mood that now surrounded her. "You've got some explaining to do, Mister." Though she kept her expression even, she couldn't hide the amusement that crept into her voice.

Chakotay stopped where he was, holding up his hands innocently. "I come in peace," he insisted, grinning wickedly.

A smile tugged at Janeway's mouth as she watched him. "And bearing gifts, I see," she nodded toward the container he carried in his hands. He finished crossing the room to where she sat and handed her his offering. It was a small, silver tin that looked very well worn.

"I figured you might appreciate a dose of genuine herbal tea after enduring the Doctor's dissertation about your ridiculous work schedule, and lack of proper exercise and shore leave."

Janeway's eyebrows shot up. "How did you know I was given a lecture?"

"Because that's what I would have spoken to you about if I were the ship's doctor," he replied softly.

She stared at him for a long time before speaking, their eyes exchanging thoughts of their own. "There isn't much I can hide from you, is there?" Another smile was his only response. She looked down at the tin he'd given her. It looked as though it had been through a war. One of the sides was dented quite badly and there were several scratches visible, dulling the once bright exterior.

"That came all the way from my home world," he began, as if answering her unspoken question. "There isn't much left, but it really works miracles when you need to relax. I'd like you to have it." She looked back up at him, an uncertain expression crossing her face. "And, no, there isn't any leola root mixed in!" he added quickly.

She laughed at that, a twinkle forming in her eye. "You're just trying to make up for having wiggly eyebrows this afternoon, aren't you?"

His laughter rang through the room. "I apologize for that, Captain. I couldn't help myself after hearing what you’d said."

"Kathryn," she murmured, setting the tin on the table.

"What?"

"We're off duty, Chakotay. Please call me Kathryn."

"I apologize, Kathryn," he repeated, his expression softening.

"You're forgiven this time," she accepted, emphasizing the last two words. "Tuvok was the only one who noticed, and he won't ask questions."

Chakotay was fighting another fit of laughter. "I wish you could have seen your face..." he trailed off, shaking his head slightly.

"Oh, I'm sure I was a picture," she replied, smiling once again. Another stretch of deafening silence hung between them as their gazes melted together. She finally broke the spell, glancing back at his gift. "Thank you for the tea, Chakotay. This is very generous of you, but are you sure you want to part with it?"

"Enjoy it, Kathryn. I guarantee you'll be relaxed in no time. You might even find your appetite," he nodded at her full plate of pasta.

"I'm sure I will."

Before the silence lengthened between them again, Chakotay shifted his weight and took a deep breath. "Well, I should leave you to your dinner. I'm supposed to be down at Sandrine's trying to humble Tom at pool."

Janeway stood up from her chair and walked with him to the door, well aware of the warm appraisal his eyes gave her in her current state of dress. "And how many replicator rations are on the line?" she asked dryly.

He chuckled softly. "I'm sorry, but that's classified."

"Figures."

"You're welcome to join us, Kathryn."

"Unfortunately, I have a pile of departmental reports I've been ignoring the last few days. I was hoping they'd go away, but that hasn't happened yet," Janeway grinned, touching his arm gently. "Thanks for the invitation, though."

He nodded, grinning back. "Sleep well, and don't work too hard," he said as the door slid open for him.

"Good night, Chakotay," she replied as he left, suddenly feeling very alone. As the door closed, she turned back to face her silent quarters. After a few moments, she marched toward the table, determined to finish her dinner. The sooner she got to those reports, the sooner she'd see whether the tea was everything Chakotay had promised.

~ * ~ * ~

Chakotay shook his head as he entered his quarters, the look on Janeway's face earlier in the day still etched into his memory. He probably shouldn't have been so bold, but he just couldn't resist. The results had been well worth the risk.

He quickly changed into a more comfortable set of clothing, topping it off with the wildest, most obnoxious multi-colored shirt that had ever graced his wardrobe. "We'll see if Tom can concentrate with this monstrosity in his line of vision," Chakotay murmured, grinning at his reflection in the mirror. B'Elanna Torres had given the shirt to him on his last birthday, just one in a long succession of gag gifts the two former Maquis had bestowed upon each other over the years. What better way to put it to use than to torment _Voyager's_ well-known prankster.

Chakotay turned and headed out of his bedroom, feeling rather proud of himself. As he was about to exit his quarters, something caught his attention out the viewport. But, when he turned his head to take a look there was nothing there except empty space.

"I could have sworn..." He stared out the viewport a few more moments before tapping his combadge. "Chakotay to Bridge."

"Lieutenant Davies here," came the reply.

"Is everything okay up there, Lieutenant?" he asked.

"Yes, sir. Is there a problem?"

"Have any ships been detected in the area?"

"No sir. We're not detecting much of anything so far."

Chakotay took a deep breath, unable to shake the strange feeling he had. "Very good. Inform the captain or myself if sensors pick up anything even slightly unusual," he ordered.

"Acknowledged. Davies out."

Everyone imagines seeing something that isn't there once in a while; maybe he was jumping the gun a bit. Still, the hair on the back of his neck didn't usually stand on end for no reason, either. Taking one last look out the viewport, Chakotay finally turned and left his quarters.

~ * ~ * ~

Tuvok sat alone in the Mess Hall, quietly contemplating the curious mixture of flavors in the soup he'd chosen for his meal. Only a few other people were present this late, all of them conversing softly at the other end of the room. The Vulcan preferred to dine towards the end of the evening after the crowds had disappeared, allowing him the peace he desired for thoughtful reflection on the day's activities.

A blur of movement in the kitchen pulled Tuvok's attention away from his meal. Keen dark eyes followed Neelix's form as the Talaxian scurried about, putting away the last of the food and cleaning up his work area. The usually cheerful morale officer appeared quite distraught this evening. It was apparent he was rushing to finish his duties, his efforts punctuated by an unusual amount of carelessness. His yellow eyes were tinged with anxiety, darting back and forth between the observation windows and the kitchen area. It was almost as though he expected something to spring out from behind every counter and storage container.

Tuvok continued to observe the Talaxian's perplexing behavior as he finished his meal. When the few remaining crew members in the Mess Hall began to leave, Neelix rushed out of the kitchen, engaging them in idle conversation until they politely excused themselves. Wringing his hands together nervously, he finally turned back to the near-empty room. He smiled enthusiastically when he noticed the Vulcan scrutinizing him.

"Mister Vulcan!" Neelix called, literally sprinting to where the security officer sat. "And how was your dinner tonight?"

Tuvok eyed him curiously, eyebrows raised. "It was quite sufficient."

"Can I get you anything else? A slice of pistachio pie?"

"Thank you, no."

"How about a bowl of ice cream or some sliced fruit? We acquired some delicious varieties at our last stop."

"I appreciate your enthusiasm in making certain I am well fed, Mister Neelix," Tuvok expressed, "but I assure you I am quite satisfied with the amount of food I have consumed this evening."

The Talaxian sat down abruptly, a flicker of apprehension in his eyes. "Well, it's been a long time since we had a nice visit..."

"Mister Neelix," the Vulcan interrupted quietly. "Are you feeling unwell?"

"No! I'm feeling just fine." The answer came a little too quickly.

Tuvok considered his observations carefully before speaking again. "You are unsettled by the area of space we are traveling through."

"Well..." Neelix began, fidgeting nervously. "Yes. I'm not supposed to discuss my knowledge of the Vardan sector with anyone outside the senior staff, but it's very hard to keep such disturbing facts from the crew."

"They are only rumors," Tuvok corrected.

"And they're all true, I promise you!"

"You must learn to govern your fears, Mister Neelix. We have no proof that there are unknown forces at work in this region of space, and the speculation of such will only serve to heighten your level of anxiety."

The Talaxian's gaze strayed once more to the observation windows. "I'm not sure what to do," he admitted reluctantly.

"May I offer a suggestion?"

"Please."

"Meditation would be an efficient means of calming yourself, providing an environment where you are in complete control in which to confront what it is that disturbs you. Peaceful inner resolutions often lead to greater composure when faced with everyday challenges."

"You think that might help?"

"I believe this type of exercise would be quite beneficial to you," the Vulcan replied thoughtfully.

"Care to offer a few pointers?" Neelix asked, his enthusiasm returning in full.

Tuvok gazed at the Talaxian, unable to fathom the other's penchant for emotional excess. He took a deep breath, quickly weighing the alternatives. "I will assist you," he finally offered, rising from his seat.

After one last trip through the kitchen to make sure everything was put away, Neelix called for lights out and followed _Voyager's_ Chief of Security into the corridors, eager to rid himself of the shadows he knew lurked just out of sight.

~ * ~ * ~

After successfully finishing her dinner, and enjoying it too, Janeway made herself a cup of Chakotay's tea. She settled herself on the sofa, finally facing the stack of reports that waited for her. The first sip of the tea told her a great deal. It tasted faintly of cinnamon, with something else that she couldn't identify, but it was delicious none the less.

By the time she put down the last PADD almost two hours later, Janeway had drained two cups of the spicy tea. Her whole body felt warm and tingly, every nerve smoothed, every worry dissipated. She leaned back on the sofa and stared dreamily at the ceiling.

"He wasn't kidding," she chuckled softly. She'd never felt so relaxed in her entire life. She vaguely wondered about the taste she couldn't identify in the tea. It was probably narcotic; it would have to be to cause this kind of a reaction, yet she felt completely lucid and in control. "This is good stuff, Chakotay." She laughed softly again as she got up and headed for her bedroom.

"Lights down," she called after returning from the bathroom. Shedding her robe, she crawled into bed and wrapped the covers around her with a contented sigh. Closing her eyes, she was suddenly very aware of her body, every heartbeat, every sensation. As she moved to roll over onto her side, the feel of her legs rubbing together caused a decidedly pleasant reaction in her lower body. Her eyes snapped back open and she stilled herself, not moving a muscle. _Has it been that long_? Janeway wondered silently, trying to remember the last time she'd allowed herself sexual release. More pleasurable sensations engulfed her body as she shifted again, causing her to gasp softly.

She closed her eyes once more and focused all of her senses inward. Smiling softly, she allowed Chakotay's face to appear in her mind, inspiring her as she reached for the source of her pleasure, both emotionally and physically. The gentle exploration eventually left her exhausted, the tide of receding joy carrying her into the first deep, tranquil slumber she'd enjoyed in weeks.

~ * ~ * ~

Janeway woke slowly the next morning. Even though she was conscious, she kept her eyes closed for a few minutes, enjoying the peace and quiet. Her entire body felt so alive and relaxed that she thought perhaps she was dreaming. But, as her eyes fluttered open, taking in the mass of twisted sheets and the fact that she was lying sideways across the bed, memories of the previous night flooded back in all their intensity. Tears formed in her eyes as she relived each precious moment. She took a deep breath, her nostrils registering the distinctive scent of herself in the air. Moving her arm, she detected several wet spots around her, and the fingers of her right hand were still slightly moist. She stopped her exploration of the sheets and began laughing softly.

"You had quite an evening, Kathryn," she whispered as she rolled onto her back, hugging herself through the tangle of sheets. And it's never quite felt like it did last night, either... She stayed like that for a long time, relaxing until the wake-up chime signaled the start of a new day. Grudgingly, she left the little nest she'd made and headed into the shower, still smiling.

~ * ~ * ~

Janeway entered the Bridge with only seconds to spare. Her shower had been far too relaxing, causing a mad dash to make her shift on time. A grin was still etched onto her face; she just couldn't seem to get rid of it.

"Good morning, Mister Tuvok," she expressed warmly, nodding toward the Vulcan as she passed his station.

"Captain," he greeted, his eyebrow inclining once again as he watched her.

"Good morning, Commander," she smiled as she approached the command level. "What's our status?"

Chakotay stood up, acknowledging her as he began his report. "Everything seems to be in order. All systems are functioning normally. There are no signs of unusual activity in this part of the sector, though it seems a bit more sparse than the original star charts indicated."

"Mister Paris, confirm heading," she ordered, a warning bell going off somewhere inside her head as she glanced at the viewscreen.

"Heading 4279.6 confirmed, Captain," the pilot stated turning to look at her. "We're right on course."

Janeway nodded, biting her lower lip slightly as she moved to sit down. She shook off the unease, telling herself that since this part of space wasn't very highly traveled, it was quite likely there wouldn't be accurate star charts available.

Her thoughts faded quickly as she realized Chakotay was still gazing at her intently from his seat. Turning her face slightly, her own gaze fell into his. The barest hint of a smile crossed his features, sending an electric current up her spine.

"Did you sleep well?" His voice was a whisper. She was about to give him an answer, but the look in his eye made her stop short. He was grinning just like a child dying to tell a secret. All at once it hit her: the tea he'd given her and her erotically charged exercise the night before...

Chakotay's smile grew wider as he watched her mind race. Her cheeks were starting to flush and she had the most astonished look on her face.

_My God, Kathryn, the tea_... she thought wildly, trying in vain to gain control of her response. She knew she was blushing, and Chakotay's reaction only made matters worse. She took a deep breath and stood up from her chair as calmly as she could, forcing herself to break eye contact. "May I see you in my Ready Room, Commander," she ordered evenly, amazed that her voice didn't falter. Without looking at him, she turned and started walking toward the entrance.

"Aye, Captain," he replied, wiping the smile off his face as he got up and followed her. He signaled to Tuvok as he passed Tactical. "You've got the Bridge."

The Vulcan nodded in response. Once again, both his eyebrows rose practically into his hairline as he contemplated what had been happening between his commanding officers the last several days.

~ * ~ * ~

Once inside her Ready Room, Chakotay waited calmly for the verbal assault that was sure to come. He would take the abuse freely, feeling no regrets about having given her the potent herbs. Janeway was standing silently on the second level, looking out the observation window. Chakotay stayed planted in the middle of the room, unsure of whether he should approach any further.

After a few minutes of silence, Janeway finally turned and looked at him, not a hint of embarrassment left on her face. She walked with deliberate strides until she stood before him, arms crossed, both eyebrows arched, and an accusing, if not mischievous look in her eye.

"Just what, exactly, was in that... herbal tea, Commander?"

Chakotay couldn't help the grin that spread across his face. "It works wonders, doesn't it?"

"That's not what I asked." Her voice remained even, though a touch of color began to rise in her cheeks again. He fought back the sudden urge to reach out and kiss her. Every nerve in his body screamed for him to take action, but he held himself in check. She looked so damned beautiful, face flushed, eyes dancing with emotion, and the air around her charged with excitement.

"It's a special blend from my home world," he finally answered, "a cinnamon-like spice and other herbs mixed with a rare extract from the Ulimar plant. My people used it to relax aching muscles and clear their minds."

"I'll bet that's not all they used it for," Janeway countered softly.

His mouth twitched as they continued their stare-down. "It has been known to have other... pleasant side effects."

"Such as?" she pressed further.

"Increased sexual desire... and response." He choked the last words out. Janeway's face was growing redder by the minute. So was his own, for that matter.

"Popular wedding gift, I imagine," she mused.

Chakotay stared back at her shamelessly. "I'm glad you enjoyed it, Kathryn." His words were almost a whisper.

"What makes you think I did?" Janeway challenged. She was blissfully unaware that he held the trump card in his hand.

"My quarters are right next to yours," he replied boldly, keeping his voice even.

Her eyes widened as the implication of his words sank in. She turned away from him suddenly, her hand instinctively covering her mouth. _Breathe!_ she thought frantically. She'd never been so embarrassed in her entire life. Chakotay waited patiently while she gathered herself back together.

"Well," she said finally, her voice a bit strangled. "The next time I think about slipping leola root into your drink, I'll know better."

Chakotay chuckled loudly, allowing some of the tension to dissipate between them. Janeway approached her desk and sat down, still trying to rub the embarrassment off her face. After a few deep breaths, she glanced back up at him. He was watching her intently, still smiling. She cleared her throat, pulling absently at the collar of her turtleneck. "Aren't you going to say anything, Chakotay? Make some comment that will further my humiliation?" The wait was killing her. She knew he was in complete control of the situation, and that he was loving every minute of it.

"Absolutely not, Captain. I respect you too much for that." He seemed sincere enough. "Besides," he continued, "I think you have a beautiful voice."

Janeway stood up with lightning speed and pointed at the door. "Get out!" she half-yelled, half-laughed, unable to stop the smile that spread across her face. Chakotay burst out laughing as he backed toward the exit. "OUT!" Her last word, though shouted, was delivered as her own fit of laughter took control.

He managed to choke out a, "Yes, ma'am," before the door slid open and he made his retreat to the safety of the Bridge. Both of them missed the curious look Chakotay received from _Voyager's_ Chief of Security. Keen Vulcan ears hadn't missed the final exchange between them, even through the wall.

~ * ~ * ~

Janeway sat back down at her desk, still chuckling, and still very embarrassed. She'd never stopped to think about how loud she'd been the night before, certainly more vocal than usual. The thought of him on the other side of the bulkhead, listening as she made love to herself, made her shiver. It would be a long time before she got over this.

Their friendship was definitely deepening, for the better she decided. She was quite sure she knew how Chakotay felt about her, though he never pushed for their relationship to go further. He let her guide their path; he always had and probably always would. Janeway trusted very few like she did her first officer. The thought of spending the rest of her life not being able to tell him how much she cared forced a lump into her throat.

"Focus, Kathryn," she murmured, closing her eyes. "I'll just have to speak with him and..." _And what? Define more parameters?_ "Damn you, Starfleet," she whispered.

Her thoughts were interrupted as the Doctor's image appeared on her computer terminal. "Captain, may I have a word with you?"

"Yes, Doctor, what can I do for you?" she asked, her command mode taking over.

"I've just completed my fifth routine physical examination," he stated. "Each of the crew members I examined registered the same elevated levels of epinephrine in their systems. Upon further questioning, I discovered that each of them had experienced some form of hallucination or disturbing dream in the last twenty-four hours. Did you have any trouble sleeping, Captain?"

"I slept quite soundly last night, Doctor," Janeway answered, hoping her cheeks weren't flushing once more. "Are the crew members in any danger?"

"Their epinephrine levels are in no way dangerous, just very peculiar, and the fact that they all had similar experiences leads me to believe an outside source may be responsible."

"Such as?" She felt a flutter in the pit of her stomach, the old gut feeling that creeps in when something isn't quite right.

"It could be a possible food contaminant," he suggested. "Olorian mold spores have been known to affect natural adrenal processes in a similar fashion. I recommend that our food supply be thoroughly checked, and I'd like to speak with anyone else whose sleep has been disturbed."

"We'll get right on it, Doctor," Janeway promised as she switched the screen off. After taking another deep breath, she tapped her combadge. "Ensign Kim, please report to my Ready Room."

Seconds later, the door slid open and Kim entered. "Yes, Captain?"

"I need you and Ensign Seven to do a little investigating. Notify Neelix that we need to check all organic storage compartments for any contaminants; everything needs to be checked, including the food in the Mess Hall. If there are any questions, the Doctor can be contacted for further information."

He nodded sluggishly, and started to turn around, but she stopped him with her voice.

"Harry, did you have trouble sleeping last night?"

"Just a little nightmare," he confided. "I had a hard time getting back to sleep afterward."

"Belay that order. You'll report to Sickbay first. The Doctor will be interested to hear about your experience. Have Seven start on the food supply; you can join her when you're finished in Sickbay."

"Aye, Captain."

Janeway watched him turn and leave, her mind clicking into high gear. Neelix's words came back to haunt her as she looked out the observation window at the passing stars. "It will take more than ghosts to scare this ship away," she murmured softly.

Shaking her head, she got up and headed for the Bridge. As the doors to her Ready Room closed behind her, the space just outside the window she'd been looking through wavered for a mere fraction of a second. No one on board caught a glimpse of the massive ship that flickered in and out of existence just off the starboard bow, nor did _Voyager's_ instruments record the incident.

~ * ~ finis ~ * ~


End file.
